Scheduling Conflict

Dear Cancer,

If we are being honest, this really isn’t great timing for me, just in case you thought I had room for one wafer thin mint. I’m going to outline any given weekday from eyes open to eyes closed.

6:45AM: The alarm goes off, jolting me out of bed. “MOMMY! GET ME!” Unfortunately I bought the wrong alarm clock; this one doesn’t have a snooze button and it gets louder the longer I stay in bed. “MOMMY MOMMY MOMMY!!! GET ME!!!! COME SEE ME!!! MOOOOMMMMYYYY!!!!!” Alarm blaring, I get Nathan from his room because, for some reason, he has yet to figure out that he is more than capable of getting himself out of bed.

7AM – 8AM: Asking a 3 1/2 year old to pick up the pace is like nailing jello to the wall. Skittles counts as a fruit, right? Add a cup of milk and I’d say that is a well balanced breakfast. As hard as I try to leave on time, I inevitably have to run back into the house for the lunch sitting on the kitchen counter, my wallet, my cell phone or (just once) Nathan.

8:45AM: Give or take 15-minutes,I am headed back to my car and away from 18 screaming, squealing, shrieking, screeching, shouting preschoolers (including my own angel). I drive home creating a to-do list in my head, where I promise myself that today is the day where I will get everything done and be in bed at a reasonable hour.

9:00AM – 10:00AM: I can’t seem to remember anything on my to-do list because walking through the front door, I trip over tiny sneakers, stumble over pieces of cars and trucks with the tires removed, and catch my fall by putting my hands down on something both wet and sticky. No work-related things can happen until my 945 square foot condo gets un-stickied, un-toyed, de-shoe-ed and de-sanded.

10:00AM – 11:00AM: While drinking my cold cup of coffee that was poured a mere three-hours ago, I start chipping away at the emails from the night before and beginning very early this morning. My students know that if they don’t get a response within 3-minutes, to email me again and again and again and again until they have fully used all my email memory.

11:00PM – 3:00PM: I won’t bore you with the details except to note that during any given day, regardless of the weather – scorching heat or torrential downpour – the landscapers will be within 30 feet of my condo mowing, blowing, sawing or trimming.

3:00PM – 4:00PM: Where oh where did the time go? I still have to eat breakfast and lunch, shower or at least change out of my pajamas and cram in another three-hours of work.

4:00PM – 4:15PM: I am officially in the car, on time, ready to get Nathan. Crap. I forgot my phone. Okay back in the car, only a little late, ready to get Nathan. Shit! I forgot my wallet. Okay…. Seriously, I am still sort of on time. It took a while to find my wallet but now I’m back on track. Oh dear G-d! Are you kidding me??? Where did I put my freaking car keys????

4:30PM: On the way to get Nathan.

4:45PM – 8:30PM: It’s Nathan’s world, I’m just living in it.

8:35PM: Mommy! I need to go potty!!!!

8:40PM: MOMMMMM!!!!! I need water!

8:45PM:Mommy! I need a band aid!!!!

8:50PM: Click play button below:

9:00PM: WHEW! I can finally eat breakfast/lunch/dinner, shower or at least put on clean pajamas, and cram in those last three hours of work.

20141215_073749 (Photo taken this morning – Ready for school!)


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